14 DAY TRIAL // 
Ride to Hell: Retribution had a troubled development cycle, as it was first revealed way back in 2008 and promised to deliver an open world experience that emphasized riding bikes in 1960s America and dispensing justice against anyone and everyone.
After rumored cancelations and practically no publicity, Ride to Hell: Retribution has finally appeared, via developer Eutechnyx and publisher Deep Silver.
Does it deliver on the initial promises or is it a shell of its former self? Let's find out.
Ride to Hell: Retribution is one of the worst games to be released in recent years. While it should be commended for actually running and for its relatively functional mechanics, it fails to deliver any type of worthwhile experience.
First up, let's talk about the convoluted story, which follows Vietnam war veteran Jake Conway, who returns home only to see his little brother killed by a gang of rival bikers, who apparently had a beef with their father.
What follows should be a traditional revenge story, but Conway's actions are borderline inexplicable, as while he tries to take out the different members of the gang, he gets sidetracked by all sorts of other things, including having lots of intercourse with different ladies who apparently give up their bodies for any favor done by Conway.
Besides the obvious pandering, the plot barely makes sense and it can't even be classified as a "so bad it's good" experience.
Sadly, the actual gameplay is just bad, as the mechanics barely work and sometimes glitch out completely. Ride to Hell blends third-person shooting with riding a bike and exploring different levels.
The shooting is extremely erratic due to the clunky camera and the fact that bullets sometimes won't even hurt enemies. What's more, they don't have a health gauge or something to let you know how much damage you're doing, so you'll just have to keep pumping them full of lead until they fall down.
There's also a cover mechanic for the shooting, as Conway can duck behind different obstacles, some of which can even be destroyed. Sadly, there are many invisible barriers that keep you from exploring the bit of cover you currently have.
When you get annoyed with shooting, you're advised to start brawling, but this is even more aggravating. Jake can only punch or kick foes, and he's advised by the game to always keep his guard up to avoid taking damage from punches and kicks.
Hit detection is all over the place, meaning even if you can see how the punch connects to the opponent, he won't receive any damage and you'll be vulnerable to counter attacks. In case you're farther away from your opponent, the title will magically pull you towards him, resulting in some hilarious scenes. In other cases, the wrench wielded by Jake will spawn in his other hand, for which he doesn't even have animations.
To complete the annoying trifecta of mechanics, Ride to Hell also forces players to ride their bike on the road, either to get from point A to point B or to engage in road warfare with enemies. Riding is a surreal experience, as you don't really get the feeling that you're driving down the road, as the bike just glides over the road's textures. Fighting while riding is a glitchy experience filled with quick-time events and the exact same animations.
Enemies are clones of three or four different models, and the game constantly throws at the player lots of foes, making the copy/paste approach even more apparent. Opponents can use cover but, most of the times, two or more foes will rush to occupy the same spot, leading to different animation errors.
In terms of visuals, Ride to Hell looks more akin to a game made in the early 2000s than in 2013. While it tries to deliver a more stylized experience, it gets dragged down by the low-res textures, the clunky animation, and the different glitches, not to mention the classic Unreal Engine texture pop-in effect, which results in disappointing graphics.
Sound-wise, the game doesn't stand out, as the soundtrack is lackluster and repetitive, while voice actors seem extremely bored or sport stereotypical accents when it comes to black people or Irishmen.
Conclusion
Ride to Hell: Retribution is a disappointing experience that doesn't even reach the "so bad it's good" distinction. It's a game that aims high but falls extremely low of expectations, with errors, bugs, low quality, and a confusing story.
Throw in the absurd 30 USD / 40 EUR price tag and this is just a rip-off.
